


Stealing the Beer

by Pixelatrix



Series: Universal Truth One-Shots: Darby in Boot Camp [2]
Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Boot Camp, Drinking, Gen, Silly, Theft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-21
Updated: 2013-10-21
Packaged: 2017-12-30 01:52:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,134
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1012619
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pixelatrix/pseuds/Pixelatrix
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just a silly set of short drabbles revolving around all the times that Darby stole beer from the drill instructors during boot camp.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Stealing the Beer

**Author's Note:**

> Bioware owns all, sadly.
> 
> Except Wallace, and the rest of my OC for the Universal Truth world.
> 
> As always, I am open to prompts.
> 
> Not beta'd, any mistakes are sadly, my own lol.

**The First Time that they got caught:**

“They’re stealing beers again.” Sergeant Evert Bayer gestured out the window where two figures could be seen sneaking towards the Officer’s Mess.

Wallace moved over to join him at the window to watch Recruits Joseph Vaughan and Darby Shepard make their way around the building to the backdoor. “I’ll handle it.”

“You said that last time,” Bayer reminded him.

Ignoring him, Wallace walked out of the office and moved across the dark compound.  He waited patiently until Joe was out the door and on his way back to the barracks.  As Darby stepped out, Wallace grabbed her by the back of the shirt.  He held her up off of the ground but far enough from him that her punches missed completely.

“You do realize that you’re a fucking biotic, right?” Wallace had always found it incredibly funny that Shepard seemed to instinctively go for fists or guns instead of her biotics.  “Not to mention the fact that striking an officer will get you kicked the fuck out of boot camp.”

“Fuck you.” She stopped trying to swing at him. “Sir.”

“Stop taking my fucking beer.” He set her back down on the ground.

“Sir, yes, Sir.” Shepard smirked up at him and then with a salute jogged off towards the barracks. 

It was only after the door to the barracks had slammed shut that he realized she still had the beer.

_Fuck._

* * *

**The Second Time:**

Wallace stepped into the mess and went straight to the fridge that contained beer and juice.  He was mostly interested in the beer. Except that this time, there was none. _Empty._ He found a note inside that suggested they reacquisition better beer.

_The little fuckers._

After he’d busted her the last time, Wallace had wondered how long it would be before they did it again.  The recruits had only been stealing a few at a time.  The fridge was completely cleared out this time.  He stepped out of the mess to find _her_.

“Looking for something, Sir?”

Wallace glanced to the right to find Shepard leaning against the tree with a bottle in her hand. “Blondie.”

“I…brought one back for you, Sir.” She set the bottle on the door and then ran for the barracks without bothering to salute.

_The fuck?_

* * *

**Not quite Stealing:**

After Sam and Joe were gone, Darby had kept to herself and kept her head down.  She’d spent most of the last few weeks in training or studying.  She really fucking wanted a pint but they’d been restricted to the base for a month pending investigation into Sam’s meltdown.

Darby in particular had been told in no uncertain terms that she was to stay in the compound.  She had a feeling that they were worried about the moral of the unit.  She thought it was fucking stupid.  Beer always made her buddies happy.

Tossing her book aside, she headed out of the barracks.  She moved carefully across the base until she reached the mess. She frowned when she noticed a bottle sitting on the top step by the back door.  It had a note on it.

_For: Blondie_

Popping the top off of the beer, Darby drank half of it before she made her way back to the barracks and her book.  She finished it as she walked and tossed the empty bottle into the trash.  Major Wallace was waiting when she got to her bunk.

“Sir?” Darby sank down on her bed and retrieved her book.

“How you doing, kid?” He leaned against the bunk across from hers.

“Thirsty, Sir.” She grinned up at the giant of a marine. “Thanks for the beer.”

* * *

**Construction with Bottles:**

“She did it again.”

Wallace stopped walking as Commander Bryant stood frozen in the doorway to the Drill Instructor’s Office.  He moved her aside to see what she was talking about.

“Fucking Blondie,” Wallace muttered.He looked at the pyramid of empty beer bottles that had been built on his desk. “How the fuck did she get in here?”

“Are you losing your touch? The maggots are _always_ terrified of the Wall.” Bryan shook her head with a laugh. “The rest of the group shakes like a leaf when you so much as breathe in their direction.  Shepard just takes it all in stride.”

“Fuck off.” Wallace shoved the bottles into a trash can.

He stormed out of the building to where the recruits were currently running one of the obstacle courses.  He ignored the questioning glance from the instructors that had been in charge of the training.  He grabbed Darby by the back of the neck and pulled her off of the rope course.

“Sir?” She stumbled several times as he half-carried half-dragged her away from the others.  He didn’t stop until they were out of sight and hearing.  She fell back against a tree when he released her. “Is…uhm…oh…you found the bottles?”

“Is there a particular reason that you covered my desk with a fucking pyramid?” Wallace was trying very hard not to grin.  He clenched his jaw and glared down at the little blonde biotic who didn’t seemed bothered at all. “Well? Answer me.”

“I didn’t have enough to make a house.” Shepard coughed a few times to hide what he was certain was a laugh.

“How many chances do you think the Alliance is going to give you before you wash out?” Wallace frowned at her. “Do you think boot camp is a fucking joke?”

“No, Sir.” She turned deadly serious. “It won’t happen again, Sir.”

“Kid.” Wallace rubbed his forehead for a moment. “I know you all need to blow off a little steam after what happened with Sam and Joe.  The investigation is almost complete, and we’ll let you have a weekend in town.  You just have to stop fucking breaking into the office.”

“Yes, Sir.”

Wallace hated the suddenly guarded look in her eyes.  It was something that she usually reserved for the other instructors.  “Blondie.”

“Sir?”

“Just don’t fucking get caught.” He shoved her back towards the others. “Get back to your group.”

“Sir, yes, Sir.” She grinned at him before jogging off over to the obstacle course.

“Don’t fucking change, kid.” Wallace muttered to himself with a laugh as he watched the group work together.

“So why the hell isn’t she terrified of you?” Bryant stepped up beside him.

“She is. She just hides it better than the others,” Wallace chuckled.  

It was a lie, and a bad one at that.  Shepard had never been intimidated by him.  He liked that about the biotic.  He hoped it never changed.  He had a feeling that the reason behind it was that they were at heart, very similar people.  He just wished she’d stopping stealing all of his fucking beer.

 


End file.
